It is a well-known fact that I loathe being alone..n d worst part is I don't only hate being alone in a literal sense, I hate FEELING lonely as well..frankly speaking, even if there's thousands of ppl around me, but those ppl aren't d ones I need d most at that point of time, I'll still feel lonely..=(
Things changes in a blink of eyes. Someone who was very much alive 3 weeks ago had already left, leaving only traces of memories for us who are still breathing on earth. Someone who was very healthy 2 weeks ago had been diagnosed with something unimaginable *though not totally unexpected* and had experienced things that she might never experience hv she not been diagnosed with this particular disease. Some virus which looks so mild few weeks back hv been on 'killing spree' lately, sacrificing innocent souls every single day. Someone I cared so much about is gone, for good I supposed, leaving me feeling d fear dat i'll never meet dat person again...
All these things affect me terribly, leaving me feeling insecure, LONELY, sad, anxious, annoyed, etc..I hate it when I hv no one to talk to, to share about what i feel...no wonder no man is an island on his own! I don't think I'll ever survive if am left alone in a stranded island. I need company, male or female, stranger or friend...I don't really mind. I've never felt this alone my whole life *due to d fact that my life is only a short 21 years...coupled with d fact that only recently I understand the real meaning of love and life*.
I really don't know how to make this lonely feeling go away...so I only did what I do best, ignore it. Distract myself with other things, happy things. Though I'm not sure whether it will do me good, that's d only option left. Whether I talk to someone about it *which is highly unlikely as I'm not d kind of person who like to share personal problems with others* or I just bottled up everything nicely and put it at the back of my mind and only 'open up' the bottle when all the problems are settled *though I totally hv no idea how it would be settled* and I'm ready to talk about it without feeling any pain or uncomfortable feelings.
Looking at d current situation, I bet it would take up to 5 years to be settled, once and for all. As for now, I guess I can only pray and hope 4 d best. As far as this 'lonely feeling' is concerned , I just hv to live with it...=(
Things changes in a blink of eyes. Someone who was very much alive 3 weeks ago had already left, leaving only traces of memories for us who are still breathing on earth. Someone who was very healthy 2 weeks ago had been diagnosed with something unimaginable *though not totally unexpected* and had experienced things that she might never experience hv she not been diagnosed with this particular disease. Some virus which looks so mild few weeks back hv been on 'killing spree' lately, sacrificing innocent souls every single day. Someone I cared so much about is gone, for good I supposed, leaving me feeling d fear dat i'll never meet dat person again...
All these things affect me terribly, leaving me feeling insecure, LONELY, sad, anxious, annoyed, etc..I hate it when I hv no one to talk to, to share about what i feel...no wonder no man is an island on his own! I don't think I'll ever survive if am left alone in a stranded island. I need company, male or female, stranger or friend...I don't really mind. I've never felt this alone my whole life *due to d fact that my life is only a short 21 years...coupled with d fact that only recently I understand the real meaning of love and life*.
I really don't know how to make this lonely feeling go away...so I only did what I do best, ignore it. Distract myself with other things, happy things. Though I'm not sure whether it will do me good, that's d only option left. Whether I talk to someone about it *which is highly unlikely as I'm not d kind of person who like to share personal problems with others* or I just bottled up everything nicely and put it at the back of my mind and only 'open up' the bottle when all the problems are settled *though I totally hv no idea how it would be settled* and I'm ready to talk about it without feeling any pain or uncomfortable feelings.
Looking at d current situation, I bet it would take up to 5 years to be settled, once and for all. As for now, I guess I can only pray and hope 4 d best. As far as this 'lonely feeling' is concerned , I just hv to live with it...=(
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